Revelation Day

So continuing on from the revelation that we are not really camping type people, it continues today with one revelation after another.......

Revelation 1. There are jobsworths all over the world, today one of us goes to the Dolphin 'Experience' only to get told off for standing still with a camera but being where they don't want him to be as allegedly, it will disturb and be off putting for the Dolphins.  So I move without question but two minutes later three workmen wearing hi vi jackets turn up and start to bang crash and wobble the stanchions on the jetty, but that's okay.....
Revelation 2. So the cross your legs toilet avoidance method breaks down at half nine, and I  have to give in and venture to the toilet block to find the cleaner just leaving, my fairy godmother is looking after me...... In I go, sparkling, so with out going into too much detail I am in a cubicle, when Harry, Luca and Louise come in and start to play.... It is when one of them starts to bang continuously on my closed door that I realise I am turning into someone close to me as I shout out 'BUGGER OFF'  a well know phrase used by said close person.........
Revelation 3.  Some local people have the right attitude.  We are out at Little lagoon a Bright Turquoise almost circular lagoon fed from a creek that leads to the sea, when a male Emu leads eleven baby emus across the creek.  We have just finished taking photos when a Land Rover type vehicle roars up to us and two Fisheries and Maritime officers jump out and captures the female member of the duo
whilst talking about a serious legal matter....... My ears prick up and if you saw the size of them you'd realise that's not difficult and so I'm on my way to defend/represent my partner, in demanding they do not keep her in custody for any longer than 60 days....... BUT they really only want to know if we managed to get a photo of the Emus crossing the creek as it could possibly be a prize winning photo that they could use in advertising Western Australia....... Their attitude is perfect, their demeanour spot on, their personalities bright and cheerful and so I ask for their email address and promise to send all the pictures onto them.
Revelation 4. Some local people have no idea......  We enter a Bakery/Cafe in Denham, I wait for, I do not feel at ease by referring to this person as a woman/lady as I feel it would be an insult to said persons, so shall we say a female human being...... To serve me but she has so much more important things to moan about to Mr String Vest with a big tummy who looks like he started his New Years celebrations several days ago along with said human being who obviously did not want to be open and working..... So as I placed my order whilst she was leaning all over the food display cabinet and she told me gruffly to go a fetch a bottle of orange juice from the glass fronted fridge on the other side of this 'Cafe' I also asked for a glass for it, OMG, Independence Day part Two...... We get a ceramic cup without a handle, instead and decide to sit at an unclean table as its the only one of the four left.  We leave half of what we ordered and walk out as female human being is coming back down to planet earth but still ranting on and on.....
Revelation 5.  There are some really dipstick parents in this world.  We go to Ocean Park Aquarium where they have lots of the local marine life, including Sharks, Rays and Sea Snakes in huge aquariums/lakes..... One of the displays is entitled Poisonous Fish, it contains Puffer Fish and Lion Fish, the puffer fish have a strong sharp beak and are deadly should you eat them, the Lion Fish are aggressive and have sharp spines that contain poison, the guide tells us all to avoid them, do not aggravate them and should you catch one whilst fishing, just to cut the line.....  So what does Moron Dad do when the guide moves on, he sticks his fingers in the tank, in front of the Lion fish teasing it, whilst his children are looking on..... What a great example of Parenting!
Sorry for the delay, just been off crabbing on the beach with family next door.
Revelation 6.  There are some really stupid people in this world.  We are again in the Ocean Park Aquarium when we approach a four foot marine rank with the usual fish and anemones in, the guide asks the children if they can spot Nemo the clown fish, some do and the guide says that this Clown Fish is exactly the same that stared in the film.  At this a woman pushed forward taking photos of the tank saying at the same time OMG are you kidding me, the real one. Click, click....
The tour guide found it extremely difficult to reply when he realised she was serious and everyone else just thought, Are you for real?
Revelation 7. It's news years eve, 3 hours left of 2015, so to you all a "Happy New Year" from us both.

Amendment to Revelation 1, Jobsworth 2, Just been asked to wear a 'Age Verification' wrist band in the bar, so bar staff do not have to ask how old we are in order to purchase alcohol........ Think I'll go to bed.........

    Whose a naughty boy then.......

    Western Australia's 2016 publicity shot.......

   

    Nemo, from cartoon to real life

    For Jackson and Luciano

Carnarvon to Council Estate

We are on the road by 7.30am saying goodbye to Carnarvon and Commiserations to those that are staying......  Heading South and three hours later we are in the catchment area of Shark Bay, I think it's time for a coffee, so instead of heading straight to the Stromatolites, we go to the 'Tea Room'. Now I just know you have a picture of a pretty oak beamed cottage in deepest Kent or Devon and are thinking, oh aren't they lucky to find such a lovely place miles from anywhere, in Australia.  Yes had it been that image, we would have been BUT we are here where a run down broken homestead/caravan park is trying to survive with a hillbilly sitting out on the porch of a dilapidated building that resembled the house that Steptoe and Son lived in......... Bill Bryson had been there and commented on the place, they had extracts on the wall, only I'm not sure that they have quite understood that he was not overly complimentary......... Still the Coffee and Tea was okay but the cages outside with nothing living in was slightly off putting........ However under one of the many leaking water pipes we saw our first Budgerigar that was not flying, together with wrens and a collard parrot all drinking al fresco, it was what we didn't see but heard under the tree next to it, that kept us from getting too close......
So there we are standing in the shell quarry, thinking this looks a lot like the beach between El Arenal and the Port at Javea, only whiter, only where here they cut out blocks of shells that have been compressed and use them as building blocks. Not that impressed so onward to the Stromatolites, which for those of you that don't know are things that grow....... They are alledged to be the oldest living known organism on this planet, basically they are a micro bacterial mat, made up from microbes which react with other organisms and make my brain hurt.......... Needless to say we took a photo and moved on to Shell Beach, where as you can see we took another photo......  Shell Beach is made up from not just millions but trillions/zillions of a certain type of cockle shell, this beach is 30ft deep and 110kms long, it's one of only two beaches in the world made entirely from shells with apparently 40,000 shells in a sq meter and one in my sandal, ouch!
Almost time for lunch, so we stop at Eagle Bluff, unfortunately the tide is out, so we drink tea and eat cucumber and cheese sandwiches with our little fingers sticking out, whilst the sea comes in and attempts to join us.  Out again and see sharks, shovel nose rays, sting rays all now coming in underneath us to feed, oh if you could have heard the squeals of delight, obviously not from me as I'm much to macho but needless to say we both want to return........
Now in February I booked up to stay in Monkey Mia resort for the new Year period, I booked it because of the festive season, the Australian School holidays and it looked nice.  Good job as it happens as when we get there it is obviously busy, only after checking in as we drive to our site, it looks like we are on some grotty council estate, it's a tip, with cars, trailers, boats, vans, tents parked all over the place and in our little bit, the men from 29 sites to use, 1 urinal, 2 toilets and 3 showers, OMG what have I done, I have now got to sit crossed legged until we go out tomorrow.......... Of course it's also got nothing to do with photo no 5, which is two feet from our front door......
This is depressing me I say, let's go for a walk, it's hot, it's sandy, and it's not the Côte d'Azur so into the bar, where after talking to two women travelling on their own and three pints of "Fat Yak" pale ale, we return to listen to the child telling his mother in the site in front of us, to shut up as she is being too bossy.......... Bite lip, turn TV on and listen to static and wait for 'Camp Quiet Time' as obviously they will all obey the rules........  We have decided, we are not real campers, we are playing at it and using it for a purpose, as I listen to the children screaming outside now as I type and watch people walk through our site to get to wherever,  we decide we have been spoilt so far by having the campsites almost to ourselves, long may it continue...........

    Stromatolites 

    Shell Beach

    Shells and only Shells 

    This is actually called a 'Nervous Shark'

   Come outside, come outside............

    First Budgy 

Holiday Part 2

We are in the computer shop before 9am and get a USB stick with our recovered files on, so then venture into Carnarvon with a smile on my face and a skip in my step until of course we try to get a coffee, closed...... So let's do grocery shopping instead, hmm not much on the shelves..... So into the Port Hotel for a Coffee where we meet the local constabulary obtaining a coffee but being about as boring as anyone can possibly be....... He is telling the Barista that he had his performance review this morning and the only criticism was 'You try too hard' which he was pleased with, he obviously did not read it the same way as I did.  My interpretation of it after spending a whole five minutes in his presence and listening to him droning on, was, 'Stop Brown nosing'..........
We order and sit outside, where we notice on the door a sign stating New Years Eve, No Dinner, Closed at 6pm.  I ask the waitress where or what is there to do for New Years Eve and she replies, "The pubs are open, well we are a pub as well but we don't want the drama and there will be drama" We are shocked, this sleepy little Town that is almost constantly closed may well have some sort of disturbance pending for Thursday night, let's hope someone is in exceptional form and does not try to please, too much.........
Next stop is Mitre 10, a DIY store, it looks like a small B&Q but in reality it's more like Arkwright's corner shop in Open all Hours....... We get what we need though, Silicon, and complete the repairs to my hat, I'm back in business!
48k later up the road, on a beach with about 12 people on, we bump into one of the couples we shared our bottle with last night, catch up on all the latest gossip, including the fact that whilst at Coral Bay, camped opposite us, he found a snake under his car, which due to it being venomous someone else had to remove..... Squeak!  We used to walk across his site in the dark to go to the bathroom....... Tomorrow new batteries for the torches........
Tide is coming in so we enter the sea at one end of the beach and get carried along in the current for about half a mile until opposite where we parked, nice snorkel testing go pro in anticipation for next few days, where we are hoping to swim with Dolphins.  After that it's a rush down South, through Perth and part two of the holiday will start....... Hope it's not as boring as part one! ...............

    Ibis Airways.....

    Banana and Custard swimming in yellow coral

Post Clampit's

As we pull back the curtains and peer towards the Hillbillies site, we see movement of what appears to be a positive nature, they look as if they are moving out.  A huge SIGH of relief is expressed by one of us, which sounded clearer than it should have done, we then notice that the fridge has stopped working....... Bank Holiday breakfast phone calls are made and we get a promise, someone will phone us back.......
Stop off at reception and ask to move site's, due to feeling uncomfortable with Hillbillies........
The reception of this request by the reception staff was amazing and after explaining why, they had no hesitation in us swapping sites.  During the next few minutes, whilst the staff remained professional, it became obvious, we were not alone in our concerns, in fact little did we know but security drove past them/us twice last night on a just in case patrol........
Next stop computer shop, closed, port hotel for coffee, closed, Fascine Coffee shop, closed.......
Look there are some tables with lots of people around, park up, grab a table and find ourselves in a 'Noodle and Sushi Bar' obviously operated by orientals but a sign states they also do take away coffee.  Within fifteen minutes we are sitting outside in the shade with a nice coffee, a bottle of orange juice with an expired best before date and two four day old muffins........ But at least it was open and doing a good trade due to everything else being closed.......
Now some of you may be wondering, why do they want a computer shop?  Well remember the day the iPad nearly grew wings, since then, I managed to delete the video file I wanted, whilst trying to make room on the iPad for it............ Even Rodney would find it hard to do that.....
So there we are phoning around computer repair services, there is only one in Carnarvon and we get a reply, it's the shop we had previously been to....... In we go, cannot promise anything but $72 later, we will find out tomorrow morning..... Fingers crossed!
We find ourselves later on a dirt road leading to a local beauty spot, down and down we go and arrive on the sandy banks of the River Gasgoine, just the place for lunch we say.  Half way through lunch the thought comes to me about getting back off the bank, up the sandy track and onto a hard surface in a two wheel drive Motorhome......... Needless to say with my expert driving skills it was a piece of cake or rephrased that should read with all the luck of the Irish and by the seat of my pants, we managed to do it with the van only reaching an angle of about 55 degrees......  So what do we do, we hit another dirt road and go to Chinamans Pool Nature reserve, it's just down the road and is obviously one of those places that is so local, no one goes there and yet it is beautiful.  It is apparently one of the few places the River Gasgoine comes to the surface as it's an underground river.........  As we are stamping (snake avoidance tactic) around the undergrowth suddenly there is this huge Indescribable  noise as easily 200 Corella's take to the sky screeching a warning to each other due to our presence, the sky was literally full of them, an amazing site and one we attempted to duplicate so as to capture on the Camera but failed miserably, so took photos of Black Swans, Ospreys, Bee Eaters, Ibis and Llamas instead.  Llamas! I hear you say, Yes, Llamas they were in the back garden of someone who also had a kangaroo, chickens, cockerel and dogs all within the same space.  Nothing ordinary about the folk in Carnarvon........
Back in time for the Spud you like social gathering and I am obviously out to impress as I have a shave.........  We sit down next to an Australian couple and then another couple we met at Coral Bay join us. Spud you like is excellent and everyone drinks the drink they had brought along whilst eating.  So the six of us are getting on great but no one is drinking and yet one couple have a Esky on wheels full of drinks...... So I commit the cardinal sin, I go get a bottle of red and invite others to drink from it, OMG, I have never heard so many pathetic " No, I'm alright" in my life, but when I start to pour it into their glasses they were suddenly elated and relaxed, this then allowed the couple with the Esky who obviously suddenly felt relieved to dive in grab a bottle and refresh their glasses......  I suddenly had drinking partners and a good night was had by all...... Hic

    Carnarvon Jetty from above

   Would you walk on this.......

    Black Swans

    Chinamans Pool Nature Reserve

Sunday another day of rest...........

Lady little legs awakes and is still not feeling on top of the world and now feels the strains of yesterday's tread watering to the Bee Gees song, Staying Alive........ Her efforts to keep afloat appear to have used a lot of different muscle groups, to those she usually uses whilst I wait on her..........  But she tells me she aches with a capital A, I of course am full of remorse and sympathy and reply, what's for breakfast ...... 
We depart Coral Bay after talking with neighbour for the first time in four days, it becomes just a tinsy wincey obvious that there has been an Xmas domestic dispute next door, he is no longer full of glowing praise for his wife, she always sits outside in the mornings to date but today she is very obviously inside the caravan whilst he is outside cooking breakfast for one, talking to me about how she would rather look at a picture of something rather than do anything  that involve activity...... During our conversation I get the feeling  he is going to ask for a family member camped somewhere else in the camp site to be able to move into our vacant spot next to him......... Whether it's a peace offering or just someone else he can talk to, who knows.......
We drive South and notice the landscape is changing, some of the trees have leaves on.......we are also hoping to find it cooler but it's 38 degrees before 11am, never mind I say, it's always cooler on the coast...... We arrive and I'm right once again, it's 37 degrees, on goes the air con......  Now last time we were here, mid November, Carnarvon was closed basically as everything we went to see or do was shut, now imagine what it's like on a Christmas Sunday, we saw more life on the road kill on the way here than in our lunch time drive around town. This could be a long three days........ Still we have the communal Spud + filling night to look forward to tomorrow, how to live it up Ozzie style.......  It makes you wonder, just what will they get up to at midnight on New Years Eve, it's three hours after their bedtime........

19.00 hrs news update.  She who was feeling unwell now feels better, she has regained her prowess in the 4ft of kitchen we have, has had the best machine wash of clothes, all holiday, so you would think she would be a happy bunny BUT 2 hours ago we were surrounded by a couple of families who appear to either be on their way or are coming from a Beverley Hillbillies Convention......... Only when our now healthy girl walked past them, saying "hi" they stopped, they looked, they scowled, they said nothing.  Jed Clampit would be a real bonus compared with these guys, needless to say I have been asked to double check that the van doors are locked tonight..........

    Carnarvon Starfish

   

    You again?

A Brilliant Day turns into a ........... Day

Someone awakes at ridiculous o'clock, tries but fails, so someone else is awake earlier than expected........  I blame it on the excitement of the day ahead, the early Xmas night and the huge amount LESS alcohol that was consumed during the day, someone else just says it because I'm a pain in the Ar*e.........
So we are first at the booking in point for our 7 hours at sea, so as to swim with the Mantra Rays, where we are quizzed upon our dietary needs, ie cheese or ham sandwiches. We select cheese, un-toasted, in the belief you cannot mess that up........
On the boat and a quick snorkel around some coral about  a mile and half out at sea, after yesterday's wind, to say it's choppy is a slight understatement, 3-4ft swell at times due also to incoming tide.  We manage it but get no photos or video as go pro says 'No SD card' which has what one can only describe as a detrimental effect on my mood as all the time I'm thinking, you Rodney, how could you forget that, even though at the same time I'm answering myself saying, I know I put it in the camera.  That snorkel becomes a blur to Rodney and me......
Out of the water on the boat and check the camera, the card is in it! Take it out put it in and it works, now my mood changes from elation to rage back to elation thinking it will be okay for Mantra Rays.......
Mantra Rays are slow graceful, gentle swimmers so crew of boat full of expectations for a successful swim.  Now obviously Mantra Rays don't know it Xmas but they do know how to party, it appears as only we could pick a day when a female Ray is on heat and has 6 male rays chasing her, this changes things in relation to her behaviour, no longer is she slow and graceful at the surface, she is not in the mood and is motoring along almost as fast as the boat and diving deep to try and avoid her so called suitors......
So what happens we dive in three times in groups, whilst the boat moves forward and drops off another group then returns to pick up the first group who missed the rays but have had to tread water for 10minutes in the previously mentioned swell.  One of us does not like this after bobbing about for this amount of time holding on to the other one of us and the safety swimmer and is so glad when eventually out of the water and on a bobbing boat, she calls it a day!
The other one perseveres this leap frog game twice more seeing nothing and is by now freezing, (what a wimp, a sensible wimp but wimp all the same) I only had a bowl of porridge to fuel and keep me going, he says........
So the rays are eventually seen, she has lost Four of them but two are still in for the long swim..... Only it's slightly deeper than normal so all we get to see is basically shadowy figures.....
Not to worry let's have lunch, I get mine first, a processed cheese slice in between two slices of I toasted white bread....... I am of the opinion that somewhere in the Indian Ocean are several satisfied little fish who may have thought that processed cheese sandwiches are a treat......
The co-participant of this blog was by now feeling slightly queasy, so another round of sandwiches floated away from the rear of the boat........
In for another snorkel with a camera that is working, it's an okay dive site but I am shivering so much, I have to get out early.  When we watched the short video back later we delete it because of the camera shake being so bad........
Final dive and it's the best, I'm in a wet suit, camera working and it's a stunning dive site, no wonder they kept it to last, we see a shark cleaning station, this is where the Sharks come to be cleaned of parasites by fish in the knowledge that the Sharks will behave themselves whilst at this site. Possibly ten sharks some being 10 feet long are swimming 15ft below me, all of it recorded on video, hooray....... Then we see Turtles, one being a baby all recorded on video hooray. Out we get elated and biscuits arrive, they are put down behind us, now I'm not sure where I learnt this bad habit but my hand flew over them and was like a JCB excavator...... 
An hour later we are ashore purchasing the DVD of the trip, someone, no names but SHE believed my camera may still not work so wanted it, what she wants she gets, so as she said, "I'm going to buy this with your money".......
So we have had some ups and some downs but get back to the van and decide on a sleep for one whilst the other showers.  I get back and say stay there it's going to take ages to download 40 minutes of video to the iPad.  Connect up and an error message is displayed, 'insufficient memory to import video' at this point obviously being the restrained calm person I am, I just managed to stop throwing the iPad across the campsite....... As such someone else failed to get anymore rest whilst advising me, my plan to drive straight to Perth airport would involve driving at night and therefore unsafe and that tomorrow I would feel totally different about things, have a  glass of wine instead, she said, besides what else can go wrong........
Yesterday we decided on skipping the mince we were going to have and just have Xmas pud with custard.  Which whilst not being the typical Xmas Dinner, we enjoyed, hence being able to go to sleep so quickly and early.  Now having only consumed porridge and biscuits all day, we decide, tonight Mathew, we are going to have mince.  The little lady chef gets on in the 4ft kitchen we have whilst I'm playing with DVD and Tv.  Dinner is served......... I said nothing, whilst the Chef was, shall we say rather critical of it and placed it in another receptacle that would not be travelling any further with us....... I ate mine, hunger being the driving force but shall we say, it was a fitting meal for the end of a Cr*p day...... Time for a glass of Red.!
Happy Boxing Day, at least we did not have to go to the sales.........

PS: Seeing as the reason for my negative pre wine mood has to do with cameras, videos and photographs, the photos below are from the DVD to give you some idea of what we actually saw but unable to produce our own record of the events.

   

Coral Bay Christmas Day

Well our day starts off at 5.15am, when her with the little legs had to get up, whilst regretting the amount of grog she consumed last night. The sun is not quite up so I decide to accompany our little lady under the assumption that no one else will be up and about. Three minutes later I am caught in just my underpants in the middle of the campsite by about 10% of Coral Bay......... All I can do is wave and wish them a Merry Christmas and No there are no presents in my sack........
Back to bed whilst all around us people are starting to move from one site to another for the Xmas morning opening of presents and consumption of beer.......  We later see rather too many of said people returning with a disappointed look on their faces.....
Not for us, we know what we have got, two cards to open........ One with a gift inside, thank you Mum & Dad Xx. Your gift and others will no doubt arrive sometime in January, as yesterday we got a phone call from the taxman before he finished work for the day at 13.00hrs........ Ho Ho Ho!
There we are having our Christmas Breakfast of porridge with cranberries when the camp site starts to empty with everyone going to the beach.  Now being the shy reserved and conservative type, I am immediately over there to with a telescopic lens.....
Is it? It can't be! It is, it's Santa, he's just arrived on the beach by speed boat....... He's not alone, he has two bikini clad elves to help him ring his bell....... Sets camera to sports mode, five frames a second........
Off to Skeleton Beach, to swim with the Sharks, we have the beach to ourselves, no phone and it's half hours walk away from Coral Bay. Are you sure about this I get asked, "Of course I am, if it all goes horribly wrong, tell them I tripped and the insurance should pay out........."  Gently does it as I enter as stealthily as possible not to frighten the 20 sharks that are swimming around searching for something to eat.  One fish we see jumps and clears the water four times in succession to avoid lining a sharks stomach.  I'm closing in on them 10 feet away, 8 ft, 6ft, 4ft go pro filming in outstretched arm and with a sudden flick of a tail fin, I am left in a cloud of sand, which is recorded perfectly on the camera, whilst the shark is now 20ft away.  We play this game continuously for half hour or so before I concede defeat, Sharks 20, Steve 0.  Then l try the stand still and wait for them to come to me game, where is their festive sprit, they approach numerous times inquisitively but when at 3-4ft they have it away on their fins as their senses are telling them, there's a plonker out here in his underpants again.......... Yuck!
As we walk back along the beach disheartened but with all limbs intact, we notice it is so much busier than before, there is now Gazebo after Gazebo lining the beach, all of which look like they have the entire contents of a Tesco Express inside, one even has a 15ft inflatable Santa Clause outside it and then there's the man singing "it will be lonely this Christmas" sitting on his own, reading his book.........
Once  back we view video after video of suspended sand particles in the sea and decide on Xmas lunch of a toasted tuna sandwich, which I eat in its entirety, no leftovers for tomorrow's curry........ What would you like to drink, I am asked by the chef as she is watching family after family opening their eski's for a cold drink, arriving at the beach by car with cans or glasses already in their hands, wandering around camp with a can or bottle in their hands and I reply, a nice cup of Rosie lea, please.  
We decide on a post lunch walk to burn off the Xmas lunch excesses, follow me, I've never been in the scouts...... Up over the dunes we go taking our lead from Google maps, only they don't show fences....... See it wasn't that hard I say as she manages to stay upright after dismounting a wobbly old metal gate, we then follow a path to the boat ramp, during which time the tide has turned.  Half hour later we walk back along the shoreline, fine at first but then after causing consternation amongst the Christmas crab community, we are looking at getting our feet wet, unless of course.  See I knew you could do it, I'm not that heavy after all, I say to the lady who is huffing and puffing........

Merry Xmas to you all, hope your day is as special as ours was as we have never had a Xmas Day like this one before and possibly won't have another one unless, New Zealand 

    Festive playmates

    Smile, say Fiiiiiiish.......

    

     It'll be lonely this Christmas, lonely and ...............

    Santa with Shades..........

    Motorhome Decorations........

Christmas Eve

Off just before high tide to the shark nursery, it's overcast and the sea no longer has any colour, it's grey and dark grey, however we do see three sharks swimming but not having our snorkelling gear with us cannot go film them, that has to wait now until Santa is just about to call on you, as hopefully tomorrow morning we will have the beach to ourselves, for obvious reasons and as the forecast is for a sunny Xmas day, better light to film in.........

The sun eventually comes out and I coax someone to come out and snorkel at low tide, we practise with small rays, moving onto little rays in preparation for our Boxing Day excursion.  Just as we should start to head in shore, we see a shoal of assorted fish, possibly 50, swimming in unison and engaging in a feeding frenzy on several of the corals. Neither of us have seen anything like it before, not even in the Red Sea or Mediterranean even after we have broken up a boiled egg in the water........

After several minutes I find the buoy next to me marking the outer extremities of the so called safe swimming, time to use those legs my dear and fin to shore. 6 feet from the shore I ask, "Have you had enough or shall we carry on" Two minutes later we are walking back to the Motorhome, talking about the feeding frenzy, at which I ask what the contents of our post shark swim Xmas dinner will be, mince I am told and no it's not turkey mince........ Now let me think, what wine shall I have with that...........

Back at the van, it's Charlottes birthday and Christmas Eve so let's break out the mince pies and celebrate with a hot cuppa, after all it's getting on and by the time we have showered, changed and got ready for the Coral Bay Xmas eve celebrations, if we are not ready by 7pm, we will have missed them..........

    Small Rays

    Little Rays

    On way to feeding frenzy

    MERRY CHRISTMAS !

Wednesday's boy camper child, is full of woe......

So just how many of you can say I woke up this morning full of the joys of Spring, singing what a wonderful world and good morning sunshine and then open the van door and step in a pile of emus do do........
The salt water bath, i.e. the sea and sun protection wally bandage appears to be having a positive effect on ankles, less redness, itching and inflammation.
Off as soon as the shops are open to do our Xmas shopping, 20 minutes and approx £55, it's all done, we are off to Coral Bay, our Christmas retreat.  Lots more traffic on the road and when we get there it's looking busy, good job we booked up 10 months ago....
Now whilst it sounds enchanting, beautiful and idyllic, apart from taking part in all the s words, snorkel, swim, sunbath and socialise, there is not much more to do and within the hour, one of us is so bored he has found, made friends with and trying to train his new pet, a tiny green bug eyed bug........ He fails miserably as bug eyed bug decides he does not like being the plaything of a bored Pom, so hops off into green grass, never to be seen again.  So far no one has acknowledged the Lost Pet notice on the site information board........
Now with yesterday's turtle blunder still on our minds, I decide to try and make amends by going snorkelling again today on the reef which is just across the road from us, thereby enabling me to change into gear at the van and walk across.  That entails me leaving my glasses behind and walking onto the beach looking for the safety indicator beach markers through squinty eyes......... I'm looking and looking and suddenly see a yellow marker near to the water level, so make my way towards it.  I stop with it about six feet in front of me, put on my fins, gloves and eventually my mask with prescription lens in, to suddenly see my yellow marker is three yellow plastic cricket stumps where some children are playing beach cricket, standing watching me, thinking what is this wally doing.......... A cheerful wave to them in the hope they cannot recognise me later back at camp........
Meanwhile back at camp it's filling up, it's going to test us as its the first busy campsite we have been on, there are Caravans, Motorhomes, tents, trailers, big ol 4x4 Utes, a converted bus and a boxed in Lorry with a boat on the top........ Oh and kids everywhere, we have already been serenaded by the neighbours daughter singing from frozen, had another trip over our canopy guide rope and sat and listened to one up the back screaming her head off and to top it off, the weather forecast for Xmas Day is 36 degrees, Cloudy and Windy.......
So as to try and get a little bit of the festive sprit, we walk around the town (10 minutes) and the camp site (5 minutes) lots of campers have lights and decorations up, one has even put Xmas stockings outside on a palm tree....... In order that we are not left out of the Christmas festivities on Xmas morning, we have decided to wait and open the two Xmas cards we were given and brought with us, on Xmas Morning, Merry Christmas...........
Now before one of you opens a Facebook, 'Go fund me page' on our behalf, please be aware that whilst you are getting up on Boxing Day, feeling as if you should have had slightly less to eat and drink and certainly not had that last mince pie, we will be swimming with Manta Rays, possibly Dolphins and almost certainly some harmless reef sharks, so enjoy and have the Christmas you want. Xx

    The view from our bedroom window, well the rear door window......

    The view from our front window

Traumatised Tuesday

You are never going to believe what happened today........ Put it like this, when I found out I was not best pleased to say the least, more about that later.

So I'm sitting there having breakfast outside when Julie comes out of the van and says look, 6feet behind me is an Emu obviously looking for any breakfast going spare, sorry Mr E my cranberries are for your truly..........  Next stop a little gift shop, where we ask is there a chemist in Town, Yes she replies, two doors down....... Doh! 

We try for a wheel chair but they don't have one, neither do they have crutches or walking frames, so we end up with tubular bandage....... Nice one Steve, now I really look like a geriatric in Bournemouth wearing sandals and socks........

After a slightly heated discussion in the van en route to snorkel, we call once again into the Visitors Center, not only because the nice helpful lady who looks like a film star is there but because someone is worried that my plans for the day will end with her demise....... 

Fortunately, some might say, it appears she was right once again.  According to the nice lady a boat got pulled out by the current where I was taking her to swim, but she is wearing fins I said......

So now with a change of plan we jump into Lakeside, not the retail center but the part of the coral reef where it is safe to swim.  It's good but not brilliant with most of it being caught on video by my go pro.  So next it's in at Oyster Stacks because yesterday was so good, however the tide is out and we are only just managing to swim with centimetres between us and the Coral.  Only thing for it, Turquoise Bay drift snorkel, where the men are shown from the stupid's and little ladies are sucked out to see and feed the Sharks.  Amazingly only one of us does this snorkel getting out way before the dangerous point, so all in all, it's been a fair to good day.

Drive back and get stopped by a couple of Bustards and yes I did spell that correctly, never seen them before but they make their presence felt by having us run around in a slowly moving van looking for a camera........

Once back and having consumed to statutory two cups of tea with a handful of almonds, we look at the video footage we took....... Five minutes into it, her that could have been a Sharks dinner says whilst looking at my iPad screen, "Is that a Turtle?"  Rewind, *<#+${^*~¥;"*#  yes it is and I swam directly over it and never noticed, what a *#$~*,^ .........

Hence the reason we went out for dinner in the Guinness palace just down the road, obviously as you can surmise to cheer up little miss Turtle spotter as she was devastated, unlike me..........

Boo hoo, hoo.........

    Bustard looking really regal after pulling our strings......

    Go away, we are playing hide and seek with the Turtle.....

    Anyone seen a Turtle?

    You can't find me.........

Manic Monday

Whilst we managed to catch up on our sleep last night we are slightly late in leaving for Cape Range National Park and even later after getting stuck behind a slow moving emu, yet again......

We arrive at the park entrance to be met by a little old lady collecting the fees and her security, otherwise known as 'Bouncers'.

Into the Visitor Centre, can you advise please, blah de blah until I say, "Can I swim out to that part of the reef" lady behind counter says, "Yes but I wouldn't, it's full of Tiger Sharks at the moment feeding on the turtles, they may be full but ........." I leave thinking what a Nice helpful cheerful lady whilst she is thinking, 'Plonker'

We decide to go to the other end of the park and work our way back slowly and within the hour we are almost rock climbing on a walk to see another Gorge, only this time with tidal sea water in.  We find two sets of Ospreys nesting on the gorge walls and plenty of evidence that the rare black toed rock wallaby frequents this location, only we never actually see one itself. After me impersonating a gazelle come mountain goat and making this walk look like a walk in the park, we are climbing up a part of the path we had to come down on the way, I am carrying both water bottles in one hand and camera in the other whilst I hop, skip and jump from Boulder to stone to rock to solid baked earth, until my right foot finds a piece of gravel........ I have a millisecond to make a decision, do I save my camera or my dignity........... I next remember looking up at my walking partner through the gap between my knees, whilst sitting fare and squarely on my butt, listening to her saying "are you alright?" I reply, "Just about but at least I saved the camera, well apart from the fingerprints all over the lens......" Next stop lunch, which bay shall we choose out of the 29 we have for choice.... We decide on Osprey Bay, how can lunch take so long,  well imagine an idyllic setting, where the Dark Blue ocean, with white water breaking over the reef, edging a turquoise lagoon lapping up onto golden sand, that's Osprey Bay........ 

After lunch we continue our bay examination and come to Oyster Stacks, where within minutes we see a Shovel Nose Ray swimming no more than two feet from the shore, it's at least 7 feet long and I'm standing 6 feet away with a camera but not a snorkel....... Ten minutes later I'm in the Indian Ocean but not a ray in sight, half hour later I come out and get asked what was it like, if I was twenty something I would have said "Awesome" but instead I say amazing, best yet and we will come back tomorrow so you can do it........

Next stop Turquoise Bay, it's okay but has a dangerous rip current that takes you out between an opening in the reef to the waiting sharks.......  

Onto Mangrove Bay and a Bird Hide looking out over a mangrove swamp, all is well until a Brahminy Kite flew over and then dived, not a happy swamp except for Pelicans, Herons and Sea gulls.......

We get back just before dusk, having avoided dozens of kangaroos who are out enjoying the slightly cooler weather but we are unable to have ankles checked as Pharmacy is closed, however we now have a new theory as to said life threatening injury because of the shape of what now appears to be a burn, it's bloody fly repellant that has reacted with the sun.......... nowhere on the can, can I find a disclaimer about not using it in the sun, so we file our law suit tomorrow and hope that the discomfort and suffering claim payout will be enough to pay for coffee........

    'Bouncers' security........

    Yardie Creek Gorge

    Osprey Nest

    Turquoise Bay

Lazy Sunday afternoon

It's 5.30am, I open one eye and it's daylight, I open the other eye and think, No hangover, thank you for the litre bottle of water last night but best I get up quickly...... Now I'm up may as well go for a walk and let someone else sleep in after all it is Sunday.  So off to explore the marina, you can now see the American influence on the town, small inlets with their own private boat berths all leading down to a small harbour, even the style and design of the new houses look more Californian than the original Exmouth housing, what I notice is the construction of said houses, all steel, no wood, no concrete, no blocks they look like giant Meccano  constructions, we assume due to the possibility of cyclones.....

Are you awake? I ask, it's 7.30am I say before asked, followed by can you look at my ankles please nurse...... It appears that the plonker who went out to Python pool in sandals has had a reaction to the Spinifex Grass that hid all the snakes as he walked through it blazing a trail for Mrs I'm not Stupid...... So a visit to the pharmacy tomorrow......

We drive off exploring the nearby beaches and immediately become aware that this is basically a holiday resort where the Australians come to relax at the weekend as within minutes we are a traffic obstruction as we drive around slowly........ We see an Osprey land on the telegraph pole with its freshly caught breakfast, we find snake tracks through the sand dunes but no snakes, we find mummy emu taking the kids out for a Sunday morning stroll, we find a 108 year old wreck of a cattle ship and a lighthouse with a view, all of which have the same problem for us, wind, too much of it, the sand on the beach feels like needles hitting us, it's a struggle to close the van doors and the sea is too rough to go in, so best we return to the camp site and take it easy so as to finish our tour of the area tomorrow, hopefully with less people about........

We get back to find our English neighbours sitting out on our site because of the shade and protection from a large tree, so we join them and share travel stories and several beers over the next four hours whilst moving every so often to remain in the shade, well that's my excuse the real reason being because the Corella's were crapping on me.......

    House Construction Aussie style

    Fresh Fish breakfast

    The Captain of this ship lost his licence for 3 months........

    North West Cape

    Will you kids do as you are told..........

Captains Log

Star Date: 19/12/2015 We have spent the day travelling and arrived at Exmouth, and        WOW what a difference, we could be in another world, this town is clean, smart with civilised people, restaurants and bars.  As I lie here now reflecting on the day, I have to say, I do believe we are a lot happier than we were last night.  
The day began slowly after a restless night and only one cup of tea at breakfast time, due to the journey being a mere 546kms, I wanted an early start, especially as it was going to get us from the North to the West Coast.  
Apart from being sideswiped by a mini whirlwind, clocking up our 10,000 kilometre and having to do an emergency stop so as the arse end of a snake did not go through the windscreen, (it had been caught crossing the road by an Eagle, who was slower than normal at obtaining the height he normally would achieve due to the extra weight of the snake he was still clutching, subsequently the end of the snake he was carrying almost collided with our windscreen, had we not undertaken the training we received from Lewis Hamilton before we left) we arrive in Exmouth, a town that apparently the Americans built, I'll say this quietly as apparently they have sensitive monitoring equipment nearby.........
Good for them I say as this town is smaller than Dampier but oh so different, for a start it has several restaurants, it has numerous bars, one of which has become my new favourite, not only is it similar to my last favourite, except for the sea view but it serves GUINNESS..........   it also has a nice comfortable area to relax and drink in, where the 'Cow girls' come to your table to serve you, a Trip Advisor review will be posted tomorrow...... it is also smart, casual and obviously designed to encourage families rather than the manual 'my wife is a thousand miles away' worker........
So having tested the quality of the Guinness, we venture forward to the Italian attached to our camp site, OMG, it's got real Italians working there, they have been here 6 years and appear to be making a good living out of it, the restaurant is busy, they deal with you in a European manner, free water with dinner, order at table, table service and pay when finished.........Belisimo!
It should also be noted that today is the first day we have become really aware of it being so close to Christmas, not only are some houses, tents, caravans, offices, shops, petrol stations, termite mounds being decorated in Christmas dec's but several Lorry Road Trains went past today with Tinsel wrapped around their 'Roo Bars'.........  So in order to enter into the festive sprit, whilst in a bakers I had a slight delve, well twice actually,  into the 'try a taste' basket and ended up buying a Homemade Christmas Pudding as well as bread, I tell you this with no word of a lie, the tasters were delicious..........
In our Lonely Planet Australia guide book it makes mention to and when we booked into the campsite, the receptionist also made reference to the fact that Emu's wander about both the town and the camp site, within two minutes of walking to the Town Center we see an Emu strutting it's stuff down the middle of a road, 30 minutes later when arriving back at the van, there's another one being photographed outside the our passenger front door by our camper neighbour.........
I don't mind Emu's being around us a bit, it's just if I have to get up in the night in order to participate in a call of nature, I now have to do it, paying special attention to where I put my feet.........
And so, here we are, once again as happy as, well as happy as before we went to Dampier, enjoying it as a holiday should be enjoyed, but only better, this time it's on a belly full of Guinness...... Beam me up Scotty........

    Mini World Wind 

    Out on the Town.......

Depressing Dampier

After an early morning walk along the beaches of Dampier, I cannot help but think of the depressing conversation being held by four guys on a table near to us yesterday. There is basically nothing here, the sign may say Town Center but could easily say "Tesco Express" because that's all that is there.  The only reason to come here is sleep after a day's work at either the Salt Mine, The Iron Ore works, The Port or the Liquid Gas Plant, which apparently you can see the lights from space at night........ 
Last night we watched the DVD 'Red Dog' which according to the locals made this Town famous, in it are scenes that could be recorded exactly the same today, the town itself has simply stood still in the last 25 years........
That may explain why some two hours later we are standing in the Deep Gorge, in the Murujuga National Park on the Burrup Peninsula looking at Rock art that is believed to be 30,000 years old.
Rock art being different from Aboriginal painting as it is made by grinding rubbing and scraping rocks together.  It takes us some time to recognise what is what but eventually we can make out some rocks with what appears to be some sort of a drawing on, albeit by a child..........  What also surprises us is the way in which the kangaroos can camouflage themselves so easily on these rocks and their agility when bounding/climbing over them.  We then find one with his rear end stuck up in the air and nose buried down between a group of rocks on the ground, unfortunately our agility and camouflage skills are some what lacking and we disturb him, when we look we find a hole about 4 inches wide 8 inches deep with running water at the bottom, no other signs of a stream/creek/river whatsoever......
No holding us back now, we are off to the Salt mine look out, 9 million tones of Salt are produced here annually from the sea, a lot of which goes to melt the snow on European roads and is made into chlorine for swimming pool treatments........ However the making of so much salt, take it from me is not a pretty sight.......
Hearsons Cove is possibly stunning when the tide is in but when it's out its another pretty beach surrounding mud flats.......
The Natural Gas plant is huge and a scar on the environment as is the Port with all roads leading into closed to the public, so that's it we have been all over and seen all that is advertised in this areas publicity, to say tomorrow we will be glad to be making our way from the North Coast to the West Coast is an understatement, as we possibly feel the same way about the area as did those British Nuclear Scientists in 1952 when they set off and tested Britain's first Nuclear Bomb 120 miles SW of here.......
Out for dinner to the Sailing Club, I shower, shave, put on dark blue shorts with a white 'Boss' polo shirt and clean my deck shoes so as to look the part, but we can only order something to eat without alcohol as we are not members, WHAT! forget it, and we go to the Bistro in the local Hotel, where we are the only customers but meet a lady from Ireland working there, she sums Dampier up as, "You only come here for the money, when you've got it, then you get out"  "Most of the people in the bar tonight are 'FIFO's' (Fly ins, Flys out!)"

    30,000 year old Kangeroo rock art 

   The real thing blending in with the background

    A rock art Goanna 

    Salt production pens