Denmark Disaster Day

We awake to the good news that the fires around us are now under control, not out but contained, from there on in, it went down hill and we should have stayed in bed..........
Not a lot got done during the morning, simply taking it easy around town before boredom sets in and we are off to snorkel in a safe Southern Ocean spot called the aquarium via a stop at the Blueberry Farm for a snack disguised as a photo opportunity for someone with the local bird life. We drive up and turn onto its dirt road which has a sign unsuitable for caravans and trailers, we keep going, yowsers, look at that hill....... The van struggles but makes it up and down the other side and then only just manages to squeeze into the car park. We walk into a shed and wait, eventually Mrs Grey comes out, she has very long straggly grey hair, grey trousers, a grey top and a grey complexion, she would be perfect in a pantomime of the wicked witch, without a lot of help from wardrobe........ I ask for an iced coffee, "can't do that we don't have ice", she replies, de ja vu, I think........ We settle for Blueberry ice cream, Blueberry Cordial and a Muffin, blueberry of course...... She has pictures of blue wrens up and I ask if the wrens frequent the farm, "They used to but we don't see them so much of late, they use to be in the bird bath a lot". Someone smiles and sits down eagerly near the garden and waits and waits during which time we notice the silver tape tied to plants, the CD's swinging from things, the birdbath having no water in and a plastic bird of prey swinging in the breeze from a tree branch........ Perhaps this would explain why they are not seen so much of late......... Suddenly she is besides our table asking us "What have you seen?"
Are they frogs? we ask, indicating the roof cross beams, she replies in a tone as only annoyed people can "How many are there, there? " She then counts them three times, huffs and puffs and disappears, which is what we suspect will happen to the frogs, once we have gone......
In the car park a family have turned up, parked next to us, have all the doors open and are having a picnic in the car....... Grudgingly they pull the near side doors to so we can reverse out, however A hole Jonny, a 17 yr (approx) is at the rear of the car with the side opening door open whilst he is changing his trainers, the fact that this large van cannot move forward without hitting him or the door is a fact that he is oblivious to or is just being awkward, we sit and wait with the rear audible warning from the van sounding, after possibly a minute, it seemed longer, his father comes around, looks at us, looks at his son and pushes the door closed half way......... I now have to do a three point turn to get past them, down the exit and with a friendly toot toot and a wave with three fingers and a thumb clenched in my palm, we leave and head towards the Aquarium snorkelling bay...... 2 kms from it we come across a gate blocking the road, it has two CCTV cameras and a sign saying 'Private Property' ( a New Housing Project) damn that's put paid to that but how the hell are we going to turn around on this single track road? I'm trying but failing miserably when someone is coming out. They open the gate, I roar through, start to do a three point turn in front of them and crash into the fence......... The fence is still standing and no sign of damage to the van so I give the couple in the car coming out a friendly five finger wave and get back out, result! So we thought until an hour later when we had overshot our turn off to another bay by 18kms, we read that the gate was installed to stop vermin entering the site and the public still had access by pressing a electronic button near the gate........... We drive back the 18kms and turn towards Shelley Beach in West Cape Howe National Park, when we run out of road......... We then have to travel on the worst road so far this trip, it is dusty, seriously rutted, has pot holes, is hilly and is 8kms long, the van is shaken just ever so slightly, we cannot hear each other for the vans rattling noise, we get to the Beach lookout and decide no more, we are still 2 kms away from the beach which is possibly 200ft below us, that means easy to get down but we could be risking it getting back up and so I do my Chicken impersonation over a cup of tea and use the tea bags as ear plugs for the return journey............