Breakfast is before nine but we wait until after so as to deal with things in their proper order of priorities, therefore the dead come before the dying and we phone the camera shops........
First is no good but the second has the camera she wants, just a pity they are 200kms away, we reserve it and state we will collect it tomorrow, a smile appears on her face.......
Before we deal with my medical emergency I ask to go for one last walk along the river bank, just in case........ As we are parked on the river embankment it is no problem getting the defibrillator out into a shopping trolley to accompany us, we commence our walk in a Solemn mood but before long we see a different kind of skink warming up in the sunshine, then a different type of lizard, followed by a family of blue wrens, followed by a pod of five Dolphins, followed by a squadron of Pelicans landing nearby where two black swans are swimming next to a heron looking for his breakfast. We stop and talk to two locals who tell us the lizards are just juveniles, that they can grow to almost two feet and then usually adopt a house to live in where you allow them to do so as they keep the mice population at bay. One of the guys has one living in his roof and he often hears it scrambling about, he then tells the story of a roof repair contractor who whilst being Ozzie macho man type, squealed like a little girl when he came face to face with one recently. We are also told that Black Swans have not been seen here on the river for at least ten years and that the locals consider seeing them as a sign of Good Luck.
Seeing as how I saw them first we are hoping that the luck will fall on us as we walk into the Pharmacy, where we impose upon an assistant my horrific injuries, she impersonates some of the people on the whale watching boat trip we went on and passes me onto a Pharmasist who suggests I get seen by a Doctor. We ask them to call an ambulance but they insist we walk next door to the surgery........
We enter and it confirms our thoughts about Augusta, it's a retirement town and on a Monday morning it's full of the ill, injured and hypercondriacs. There are three doctors on duty but I have no chance today of seeing one of them, I can have an appointment at 11.15am tomorrow, my nurse in training, whilst feeling exhausted from carrying around my intravenous drip, states we can't do that, we have a camera to pick up......... and so we leave and go food shopping in a supermarket that is playing Elvis Presley singing 'Glory Glory Hallelujah' is this an omen I ask my nurse? She replies, "What type of cheese do you want"
We are off to Cape Leeuwin and its lighthouse from where we can see the two oceans collide when they meet. As we arrive the sun retreats behind grey cloud so we settle for a coffee and scone, we sit down and I look at the table opposite and there before my very eyes is a lady who immediately reminds me of my nan (deceased). Is this an omen I ask and get told, "No! It's just an elderly lady with a perm"
This lady is with her husband awaiting two other couples to come back from the lighthouse, they return and the three ladies go off together and disappear. Having finished my coffee and getting bored awaiting my allotted time to go on a guided tour of the lighthouse I decide to utilise the time by a trip to the bathroom. I follow the signs which lead you through the souvenir shop where I see two of the ladies previously mentioned, I walk past them to the bathroom and it's just one uni sex toilet, it states vacant so I open the door and find the third lady sitting down on the toilet, no more details are necessary at this point...... I apologise, she smiles and I return to the cafe, where ten minutes later all three ladies return, and upon seeing me giggle and pass comment on the lack of observation by her security detail and that had she used the lock on the door I would not have been embarrassed.....
Five minutes of fun conversation was then had between us, where all I can say is, elderly ladies know how to have a laugh.......
Up 176 steps to the top of the lighthouse where the guide managed to fill out what should have been a ten minute trip into half hour of delivering insignificant facts, including that one of the rocks in the sea just outside was called Cumberland Rock and is the exact polar opposite to the white house in Washington DC and when she has American tourists she tells them it's The Presidents escape route...... I'll let you get over that side splitter before I continue and tell you about the Hospital visit.....
My finger is continuing to be painful especially whilst holding the steering wheel, which does take up the majority of time I'm driving, so we see a Hospital sign, let's see if they have 'A&E' I say, so walk in and see Mrs J Obsworth the receptionist, I show her my finger and ask if anyone is available to advise me as its now more painful and I am unable to see a doctor, no need for treatment, just advice as to it will be okay or get it seen to........ Reply, "Are you saying it's an Emergency, we are an Emergency department" When I parked up outside I noted there were no other cars parked in the visitors bays, when I walked in I noticed there was no other persons waiting in the waiting area, whilst at the receptionists desk, I noticed three nurses talking in the nurses station about one of them getting a new dog, whilst the receptionist herself was photocopying a document. I look at Julie, raise my eyes, turn back to the receptionist and state, "I have been bitten by I don't know what and everyone we have met so far in Australia has told us that nearly every living thing in this country is out to kill you, I cannot see a doctor, yes it's Urgent". We then have the are you UK citizens if you live in Spain discussion and that I may have to pay for any examination and treatment. Do I @*#!;@ care, came out, "That's okay, we are insured" Twenty minutes later I am connected to a heart monitor, blood pressure gauge and something to check my oxygen levels, whilst the nurse who personified the typical old school matron, examined me and states never seen anything like this before.....
Oh how my confidence was boosted by that statement.... She is reluctant to interfere with it with an instrument as when she squeezed and pressed it, my hand involuntarily pulled away whilst my lungs suddenly took in a huge amount air....... There is no tracking of the infection into your arm, your temperature is normal, your oxygen intake is 99 out of a 100, the pain is no doubt from the increased pressure caused by the puss and you are rather handsome, leave it and see what it's like tomorrow, is the diagnoses. I ask how much I owe or need to pay and told, No Charge to anyone who says their blood pressure is higher than normal because of being dealt with by an attractive nurse.......
Just caught Breakfast
Go away, I'm warming up
Cape Leeuwin Lighthouse
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